An Open Letter To the Roast Beef Monster - Part 2

Dear Roast Beef Monster,

I have lost my appetite.

Yours sincerely

iamstockmonkey

Review: Black Swan

Like Scorcese's Shutter Island, Black Swan doesn't do subtle - everything is way, way over the top and as an added bonus, any jokes about a honking soundtrack work on another level too this time.

Review: Blue Valentine

When a film starts with a dog dying, you know its not going to be a barrel of laughs - and if you think that sounds grim enough, just wait till the abortion scene.

Review: Morning Glory

Digital Spy reckon that Morning Glory is to The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, only in the theme of proper journalism though, so you don't need to be worried when Harrison Ford starts talking about going for a prostate exam.

Review: Catfish

Thanks to The Social Network, Catfish is robbed of the best film about Facebook award, but it still manages to cram in several on the edge of your seat moments, not bad for a so-called 'documentary'.

Some have debated whether Catfish is real or a hoax - my two pennies worth is while it might not show 100% what went down as it went down. I do believe the central story is a true one, just one with a few extra shots thrown in to tie it all together.

Review: Let Me In

Featuring a bit more on the cop and the older man means Let Me In is more than just a pointless remake of Swedish classic Let The Right One In, the added CGI bits is a bad move though as the lack of that kind of thing is what made the original, and for the most part this, so good.

Review: Megamind

It seems the best Will Ferrell films these days are the ones where he takes a step away from crude man-child jokes. Here he drops the filth and in places it comes close to matching the same charm as Christmas mainstay Elf. On the downside Brad Pitt seems to be asleep/stoned or possibly both as the voice of rival Metro Man and the film would've been infinitely better with someone livelier in the voice booth.

Review: The Next 3 Days

The spectre of Crowe's last film hangs over this throughout. Firstly to raise the cash to break his wife out jail he has to go robbin' in the hood, then to break in he tries to become Robin of Locksmith by making a skeleton key. Is it any wonder in the end he picks a South American country with a load of trees to hideaway as a fugitive.

Review: The Fighter

Two things about this film:

1) It's terrible
2) Bale on crack is nowhere near as good as Phil Mitchell on crack

TV Moments of 2010: Barrowman Does Owl City

Even the image captured in the title doesn't quite match this for gayness. I still can't work out whether this is the worst or the greatest thing I've ever seen.

Barrowman! *shakes fist*

TV Moments of 2010: Doctor Who

Flawless reinvention of Doctor Who - within the space of an hour anyone doubting whether Matt Smith could live up to David Tennant had their answer. It also must be noted just how good looking the show is now (and I'm not just talking about Amy Pond) as its almost unrecognisable from the ropey sets that were about up till a couple of years ago.

TV Moments of 2010: Henry Rollins on Sons of Anarchy

If there was an award for Best Bastard of 2010. Rollins turn as a White Hate leader would win hands down - and was a major reason why Season 2 of Sons was so much better than its first.

TV Moments of 2010: The IT Crowd

In truth The IT Crowd is bit patchy now, but there's still enough funny moments to make it worth watching. Street Countdown was the best of the lot, not for Moss appearing on Channel 4's ultimate geek show, but for paraphrasing Rowdy Roddy Piper

TV Moments of 2010: Lost Finale

It could never live up to the hype and wisely never tried to, as to answer all the fans questions would've needed one of those Christmas Lectures in its place. The most notable thing apart from trying to work out whose dead was the 5 am simulcast on Sky1, just a shame that all the big TV shows have gone now they finally worked out a way to take on the pirates.

TV Moments of 2010: Phil Mitchell on Crack

Note to Peter Jackson. Forget all the expensive CGI nonsense, just give Phil a couple of rocks next time and you've got yourself a ready made Gollum.

TV Moments of 2010: Sesame Street

Sesame Street needs to be back on British TV now - rising to the challenge of Yo Gabba Gabba for the cool kids crown, this year's parodies and celeb appearances mean it is arguably better than ever now - though quite why this was okay and Katy Perry's breasts weren't is up for debate.

TV Moments of 2010: Sherlock

Apart from Moriarty going all Louie Spence at the end of episode 3. These 3 feature-length episodes perfectly puts Holmes of the past and into fast moving a modern day setting.

TV Moments of 2010: This Is England 86

Still one of the best things on TV this year, even if the last 2 episodes did end up a little bit like Kevin Bishop's Mind Cop - determined to fit a rape in.

TV Moments of 2010: Wagner

Proof that Eurotrash was the ideal Saturday night family entertainment show all along.

Films of 2010: Black Dynamite

2010 seemed to be the year of the notumentary and films pretending to be real, but so loving was the homage in Black Dynamite, you'd almost think this was plucked straight out of the 70s itself.

Films of 2010: Catfish

In any other year this would be the best film about Facebook by a long mile.

Films of 2010: Defendor

The 2nd best Kat Dennings release this year, after this (NSFW)

Films of 2010: Exit Through The Gift Shop

I'm Still Here had all the hype, but this was the year's best fake/real documentary.

Films of 2010: Four Lions

Going on a certain ride at Alton Towers will never be the same after this..

Films of 2010: Inception

A movie so good even Alan Partridge wants to take a break from Bond to watch it.

Films of 2010: Kick Ass

I can't quite work out whether Nicolas Cage is amazing or awful in this. But rested assured there's no doubt about how good Kick Ass is.

Films of 2010: Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World

Scott Pilgrim literally and figuratively flies all over the place during this. There's just so much going on screen at one time you watch this several times and still find some new subtle geek reference. Flawed but fun.

Films of 2010: Shutter Island

A memorable soundtrack, and not always in a good way - Shutter Island is Scorcese at his most OTT, but is still great fun to watch.

Films of 2010: The Social Network

Whilst there's a few trademark Fincher flashes to found, director David Fincher takes a back seat for the most part to let Sorkin's script shine in this tale of the rise of the Facebook phenomenon.